NLP Confidence Building Techniques


Confidence and Social Phobia affect many people, at many different times, in many different ways.

Most people with low confidence, look forward to their social and important events in a very unresourceful way - always imagining the worst possible outcome. Luckily there are many NLP confidence building techniques that can help with these issues.

The first step, is to make a list of any time in the future when you know you will feel uncomfortable.

These may be single events such as a job interview, or more general events such as meeting people, or ordering in a restaurant.

Take time on this list, as the more areas you cover now the better your results will be, though you will think of further items later, and can return to this process whenever necessary. The idea is that over time as you eradicate these individual issues and spend more time in a positive state, the negative state will become less and less a part of your personality. Your brain actually prefers positive states but you need to practice them until they become automatic.

Once you have the list, you need to run through the NLP Swish pattern with each one.

Make sure you put a lot spend some time creating a very powerful and confident image for the second representation used in the swish.

This will take some time.

There are also a couple of exercises, specifically for confidence.

Regular use of the Get Grounded exercise is a good idea, especially as preparation for something like a job interview or social occasion.

The more you work with this exercise, the more it will generalize and you will start to drop into the correct state automatically.

People with low confidence also regularly let their internal voices get the better of them.

Use the Kill those nagging voices technique to take control of your critical voices.

Performing this exercise regularly is a really good way to remove your hesitancy over a period of time.

If you have embarrassing or uncomfortable memories from your past than you keep remembering that make you doubt yourself or feel less confident or less resourceful, then use either the NLP Whiteout or the Mommy make it go away technique to prevent these from affecting you.

A really important aspect of NLP confidence building is to ensure that you have access to positive states.

Use the NLP Anchoring technique to build yourself some powerful states, and use them whenever you need them. This works in a similar way to the Get Grounded exercise.

All of the techniques listed above can be very useful for improving your confidence and can be used whenever necessary.

Most people with low confidence are very good at generalizing, and once they lose confidence in a particular aspect of their life, it is easy to allow that to spread to other areas.

Your job is to work through your life looking for the moments when you lack of confidence takes control, and to change your behavior using the NLP confidence techniques I have listed.

For a few weeks you should attempt to catch yourself any time you hesitate, work out what the cause is, then run whichever of the exercises mentioned above is appropriate.

Remember the more you work with these exercises the more your unconscious will start to generalize the new behaviors and states you create rather than your previous unconfident behaviors and states.

If you have an questions, or feedback about your progress using these NLP confidence exercises, then please feel free to add your comments or contact

Good Luck!


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Previous comments

Getting there ... slowly

I've done a lot of the exercises, and some of them worked better than others for me. The problem is that after the initial buzz I often sink back to almost where I started over a period of days or weeks. Is there a way to make these NLP changes stick for good?

StevieB, Atlanta

Posted May 7, 2010 at 09:34

Practice Schedule

This is a common issue. I've always found that there is often a threshold element at play. If you keep doing the NLP confidence exercises regularly after a period of time the behavior becomes your general behavior. The more confident experiences in your life, the more confident you will be more of the time.
There is also research on learning that suggestions that when people are trying to remember something there is a pattern to the best way to memorize something. It is something like learn it, revise it a day later, then two days later, then a week later. Basically length ing the time between revisions. If I had a hypnosis cd for a problem that I really wanted to solve, I would use it daily for a week, then every couple of days, then once a week ...

Basically, I would use that kind of structure for your NLP confidence exercises.

Chris Harrison, UK

Posted May 14, 2010 at 21:38

Try the walking your blues away techniques. Do NLP when you walk. Just don't ever stand up on the top of the mountain and say "Look how awesome I am!" :)... if that makes sense (it's true) ;). :)

Sticky, Lawrence

Posted December 10, 2011 at 09:48